I'm looking for a few good trolls!

My friends, my friends -- now that I'm an expert bloggist, there's one thing I've learned about this craft.

It's HARD!

It's not like those townhalls, where you can just slice and dice your stump speech, sprinkle in a few nice words about the the policies everyone would prefer but I refuse to adopt, then head back to the bus where Tim Russert can give me a back rub.

Apparently, the internets are really big on "output" and "originality".

Consequently, my friends, I've decided that I need some help.

My friends, I'm looking for a few good bloggists, a few good e-men (and women!). I understand such inline warriors are call "trolls".

So, my friends, I'd like to recruit you as my merry band of loyal trolls!

I've been hard at work, coming up with talking points that you can help me spread over the internets. For those of you that can't transcribe your favorite objective journalist (LOL - that still means Lots of Laughs) fast enough, I've written some out for you.

For example, when someone stops whining about their lack of health care or bitching about their loved one's 84th tour in Iraq long enough to focus on the real issues -- the issues like SOLUTIONS, which matter to everyone -- you can refer to my mothership and BAM!

Or - you can bring it up yourself...

If you're 'rapping' with someone online, and they start talking about boring things like 'Social Security' or 'GI Bills' -- you can say something like:

Why are we wasting our time talking about these distractions? We should be talking about the ISSUES. For too many elections, too many politicians have been afraid to tackle the real ISSUES that affect their lives. Isn't it finally time we talked about SOLUTIONS? John McCain believes this is a time for SOLUTIONS! We ought to stop with distractions - John McCain believes now is the time for SOLUTIONS! SOLUTIONS are the major issue of our time. We cannot continue to waste our time arguing and we must deal with the issue of SOLUTIONS!

SOLUTIONS!

When they claim you're unwilling to discuss the economic, diplomatic, and military feasibility of a 100 year occupation of Iraq - you can even pretend you're Ronald Reagan and say "There you go again..." and get them back to talking about the real issue this campaign, SOLUTIONS.

We're working hard to come up with some rewards for my loyal trolls - but we'll have more on that later.

Keep checking here -- I'll even give you a heads up on hot new talking points before they hit the mothership!